April Fool's Day
by Shauna Lee
Summary: I don't know if this was done last year, but I want to Challenge all you talented writers to come up with your take on what April Fool's Day would be like in the Witchblade universe. Here's what I came up with. Please R/R


April Fool's Day  
Ian Nottingham sat in the dark on Sara's fire escape, watching the Wielder settling down on her couch with take-out Chinese food to watch a movie. He was well pleased with the results of his labors this day. Sara was in a fantastic mood, breaking out into the occasional snicker, all because of him. He loved to see her happy, especially with all that had been happening in her life to weigh her down. Of course, she did not know he was responsible for her entertainment this day, but he had a feeling she might suspect it anyway.  
  
It all started with his realization this morning when he woke that today was April First, a day when people played harmless pranks on one another. Normally, such a thing would not have mattered to him in the least, since his master never indulged in such a pointless and frivolous occasion, nor did he allow Ian or any of his staff to do so. But something in him had been changing since he had begun his duties as Sara's guardian, and today the impish impulse he woke up with just would not leave him, no matter how hard he tried. He decided to just go with it, and as he dressed ideas began to pop into his mind.  
  
A highly intelligent and skilled warrior, Ian had never had the opportunity to apply his mental abilities in such a fashion, so he wasn't too sure where to start. He wasn't worried about his pranks being juvenile, because as he understood the concept, the more sophomoric the better. So as he made his way to Sara's apartment, he made a few stops along the way and assembled his "arsenal" for the day.  
  
When Sara had finally gotten her fourth cup of coffee down and headed out to work, she found the box on her doorstep, the kind of box florist shops deliver long-stemmed roses in. Ian watched from the fire escape window as she brought the long box back into her apartment and untied the red ribbon. When she lifted off the lid and looked inside she stared in shock for a minute, then began chuckling. Inside were a dozen white and pink carnations and a large rubber chicken. Still laughing, she put the flowers in a vase and took the chicken with her when she left.  
  
When Sara and Jake went out to lunch in the afternoon, Ian used his highly trained abilities to sneak into the precinct and distribute more of his items around the office. When they returned from lunch there was a meeting in Dante's office. When the Captain sat down in his chair to start the meeting there was a huge fart as the whoopee cushion Ian had slipped under the thin chair cushion went off. Everyone tried not to laugh, but couldn't help it. Then as Dante was drinking his coffee he jumped, yelling, and spilled coffee down the front of his shirt. Investigation of the coffee cup revealed the plastic dog turd at the bottom of the mug. Dante, furious but unable to discover the true culprit, stormed out of the office to go home for a fresh shirt. Everybody busted up laughing, even Orlinski.  
  
When Orlinski got back to his desk it was to find a nicely wrapped box of chocolates, just four of them, and proceeded to eat them all one after another. Unfortunately, as the next half-hour revealed, the chocolates contained laxative, and he went home with bad gas and a case of the runs. Sara had a huge grin practically perma-fixed to her face by that point.  
  
Jake managed to repeat Dante's performance with his coffee as he finally got down to the bottom of his cup to find a very realistic plastic frog there. Jake was lucky enough to have a spare shirt in his office, but unlucky enough that Ian had known about it and the shirt was doused in fruity floral perfume. To Jake's further dismay, his voicemail had somehow been filled up by someone breathing heavy, fifteen minutes worth, recorded while they had been at lunch.  
  
A few minutes later Vicky Po called Sara down to the morgue. Sara and Jake went immediately, since Sara said she had sounded strange. It turned out Vicky was trying her best not to laugh. She took them to the freezer and pulled a body out of it's drawer, and Sara lost it completely, laughing so hard she had to sit down. The cadaver had been dressed up like a clown, red rubber nose, metallic rainbow wig, funny shoes, face paint, the whole nine yards. Since it was a body Vicky had already finished examining, the chest that had been cut open for examination had been filled with green jello, a smiley-face in whipped cream adorned it's stomach, and there was a miniature rainbow wig adorning it's private part.  
  
Sara and Jake took turns telling Vicky about the havoc upstairs, and after a good laugh they tried to figure out who could have done all this, but never came to any conclusions, although Sara did look like she had an idea a time or two. Still chuckling, Sara and Jake went back to their office to finish up the day doing paperwork. Nothing else untoward happened after that, and when the shift ended Sara headed home for a quiet evening, stopping by the Chinese place and the video store. She rented a few comedy videos, and was contentedly eating her dinner, when she suddenly turned and looked out the window, catching Ian there. She got up and went over, pushing the window up as he stood, hands behind his back and head bowed, waiting for her to get mad at him for spying on her.  
  
"Hey, Nottingham," she said. "You responsible for all that mayhem today?" She sounded amused, and Ian ventured a look through the curtain of curls hiding his eyes. She was grinning.  
  
"I must confess that I am, Sara," he said.  
  
"Thought so." She sounded smug. "Thanks. I needed a good laugh."  
  
"You are welcome," he replied, somewhat surprised.  
  
"Want to come in and watch a movie," she invited. He hesitated only a moment.  
  
"I would like that very much," he said, entering the apartment when she stepped aside and made way for him. They settled companionably on the couch, spending the rest of the evening laughing at the outrageous movies Sara had picked. Yes, Ian thought as he looked over at the smiling face of the woman of his dreams, he was well pleased with this day's work. 


End file.
